Regret

I hate it when I regret a decision I've made.  Most bad decisions I have been able to live with - I tell myself there's nothing I can do about it now.  Learn from it, live with it, and go on.

But there is one decision that I had made in my past that continues to still haunt me.  There was this girl I gave up right after my senior year in high school.  She had it all - pretty, understanding, sweet.  She was my first real love.  Everyone wanted her and I was the one that had her.  I found a picture of her today when I was cleaning up an area in the basement for my wife's new "office" and I've been in a remorseful, melancholy funk all morning over it.

I hadn't thought about her in a while but when I saw her picture today, my heart sank remembering how it was with us.  She was so beautiful and we had such good times together.  We were almost inseparable.  I remember the first time we met, I remember the parties we went to, I remember being able to tell her anything.  I remember some nights just holding her in the dark.  We had that certain electricity that people hope to find in a relationship.  Looking back, I realize she had a magical quality.  She was everything a man could want and I miss her.  Sometimes you don't really know how special something is until you no longer have her.

Through the years, I have secretly thought about her from time to time... wondering where she is, who she's with and what she's doing.  I hope whoever she's with is treating her right.  Even though I should feel lucky and realize I have a great life right now, deep down I can't help feeling that letting her go was a big mistake.  Sometimes I lay awake at night and look at the shadowed ceiling wondering how different my life would have been if I still had her.

Sorry.  I just can't seem to shake this off.  But I'll get over this feeling like I always do.  Thanks for letting me get this out in the open.

This morning, I did scan the picture I found if you want to see her.  My first sweetheart.

 

   

   

Comments

haha!  Are you my Twisted Sister?

hehe  gotcha.

LOL... you suck.

 

And she is gorgeous.

sweet!  i couldnt help but wonder, had it been a double neck would that be considered a three way? lol

She's hot

You should say eff it all and try to get her back....lol. I was totally fooled for awhile and I was getting ready to scold you for having such heavy thoughts for another woman besides your wife...lol.

 

 

The Truth Is Out There. Trust No One! Deny Everything!

You're upsetting me....on several levels.

-I am The Phoenix that rises again.
-I am The Oasis in this dry world.

Ack!!!! Ack!!!! It WAS a Gibson Hummingbird and he snorted it up his nose!!!  If there's a hell, there should be a special place with hot spikes reserved for him.

A while back, the media made a big deal about a guard allegedly dipping a terrorist's copy of the Koran in a toilet.  That doesn't even compare to hocking a Hummingbird for blow.

CryCryCry My hummingbird. It was wonderful for playing Spanish guitar, my Beatles and Classical. I haven't seen this in so long.

If I was standing on a fish, I'd slip and fall......

*snicker*

I didn't think about anyone getting vehklempt before they hit the picture link.  Sorry for the roller-coaster ride. haha! :)

 And Lynn... DO NOT tell me your ex pawned a Gibson Hummingbird for coke.  Tell me it was another guitar that had a hummingbird on it.

It was a fairly decent copy of a Gibson Les Paul except it had a bolt-on neck.  I think it had a "Westbrook" logo on the headstock (Chinese mfg?).  Not really what I would call a fine quality guitar but I wish I still had it.  It had a certain sound.

I've had others through the years - selling them if they didn't give me the exact sound I was looking for or if I wanted something different.  I'm not a collector, just a player.

Right out of high school in 1980, I sold the one in the first link to partially fund a dream guitar - a custom built Carvin which I still have (black - below right).

In 2002, I sold an American Fender Strat, an expensive rifle, and a Martin acoustic to have another Carvin custom built - the silver one on the left.  She's my main one now and the black one is used as a backup.

I try to make wise purchases and purposely keep the guitar herd down to a few quality pieces.  This seeming spending discretion also keeps my wife off my a$$.  So... I play those two 6-string electrics, a taylor acoustic, and a Fender USA Jazz bass.

Not in a band right now.  A married 46-year-old can (and WILL) get himself into a hell of a lot of trouble playing in bars on weekends.  That's done.

I shoulda known... *shakes head and walks away*

Count me in on so effing gullable. ALL the way to the END. And I clicked on that link really fast too!

And who, here, didn't think of their first love? Human, that is?

After seeing the picture, I felt your pain and my own. The guitar I played at the Royal Albert Hall meant everything to me. It was my first 'own' guitar, not the Montgomery Wards model that I first started learning with when I was 12. This guitar had a hummingbird on it.

A really stinking ex hocked it for drugs. And all my Elvis albums.

That's funny, my Hubby is playing Elvis songs for me right now from YouTube. He has no idea what I'm typing either.  Go Little Sister.

Excellent blog Stevie. Excellent.

 

If I was standing on a fish, I'd slip and fall......

There's a Lucero song about her. It's called "My Best Girl". It's on there MySpace page now. Scroll down their music player just a touch to see it. I think you'll understand it.

Myspace.com/Lucero 

 

"I'm just like you only shorter."

 

i cried...and then i laughed.

i'm so effing gullable. 

Absolutely gorgeous. You'll never find another like her. 

Be yourself...... Everyone else is taken!

Good stuff.

I would've gone with stratocaster aswell...

...is she a stratocaster or epiphone? am i close - the photograph is small so it is a first glimpse guess.

Tuna ><((((*> the other white meat! I am Keeper Of The Whip!

awe, nice one i think you need to hit the pavement for a few miles! btw, husband as a similar love, a vintage peavey. and when he feels like taking a mental break, he becomes our very own rock star for the day. very live. every bit unplugged.

Tuna ><((((*> the other white meat! I am Keeper Of The Whip!

Wow Stevie, no wonder you keep thinking about her...She's perfect!

She's stunning. 

 

"We are stardust, we are golden, we are billion year old carbon

And we've got to get ourselves back to the garden"

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